Why is it that I can't take a relaxed, private shit without some 40-year old in loafers standing in the stall next to me alternately holding his breath and exhaling loudly trying to squeeze out a couple drops of piss? And then, when he has stage fright because I'm in the stall next to him being polite enough not to do any business until he leaves, why does he always flush the urinal when he leaves? He isn't able to produce, and actually touching the damn thing to flush it probably gives him more germs than he removes by doing said act.
And what's with the guy who, while I'm trying to take a piss of my own, just shits as loud as he can? Again with the breathing and grunting, and then "plop, splash." What am I supposed to think about? How can I not just KNOW that this guy's hairy ass just got spashed with dookie water? This does not make for a comfortable pissing environment. Good god.