I got the pulsatin' rhythmical remedy (busychild424) wrote,
I got the pulsatin' rhythmical remedy
busychild424

Oh, oh yeah! The crazy lady downstairs!

So there's this crazy lady who lives two apartments below mine. Apparently her name is Connie. She drives a mini-van. I'm scared that she's allowed to drive at all. Let me tell you a story about her from a few months ago.

First, you need to know a bit about her apartment. It's on the lower level so it's partially below ground. The windows on that level start at about chest level and go up. Her window is directly beneath the balcony of the guy below me, and then I'm above him. I'm fairly certain she spends every waking moment standing at that window staring out. There's an empty lot back there with trees in it, basically, that she looks at. Birds and squirrels hang out a lot, and at night a raccoon and a possum. Sometimes I see her out there tossing bread crusts out there. Because, of course, the birds will starve if she doesn't do her part.

Anyway, this is still when I worked at WorldPages. I'd come home for lunch one day, and when I left, she had lugged one of those generic white patio furniture chairs that you can get at the drug store outside and was sitting outside her window, under the balcony of the guy above her. It was a beautiful day and I had the windows down. I avoided talking to her though because at this point I already had a feeling she wasn't all there. I got into my car and backed out, and as I started driving off, I heard her yelling. I was in a bit of a challenging mood, so I backed up and the conversation went as follows:

Me: What did you say?
Crazy Connie: I said, all day traders are going to hell.
Me: What gives you the idea that I'm a day trader?
Crazy Connie: Did you think I was talking to you?
(keep in mind, this is the first conversation I've ever had with this person.)
Me: I don't see anyone else around here.
Crazy Connie: Well I guess you must be mistaken.

Uhhh, ok. So I drive off, and as I'm driving off she yells something else, which I opt to ignore. Weird lady.

Another story about her - apparently the other day she called the police because everyone wasn't parked as they usually are in our lot. This is retarded because not only is it not police business, but we don't have assigned parking spots. My sane and very nice neighbor Kathy related all this to me. I guess Kathy tried to talk to Connie, and Kathy is convinced that I work at a salon and change my hair color every week (I've had brown with blonde tips for months, and before that it was all blonde for years). She also thinks that Tandra is evil or something. Evidently she also complained to the police that someone (she wasn't smart enough to figure out that it was someone on one of the balconies abover her) was tossing cigarette butts out into the lot outside her window.

Who calls the cops about that? She's lost her mind entirely. Tandra wants to run into her so she can make an ooga-booga face and scream "I'm the devil!" at her or something. This would be tremendously entertaining to me.

:-)
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