Tim's funeral was really strange.
To be really blunt, Tim has some seriously WT connections. I'm talking an entire family of people who showed up for this thing in denim and leather. The WHOLE FAMILY, kids included. There were quite a few other people there who were obnoxious. People were loud, laughing, loudly saying 'AMEN' at weird times. The leather and denim family decided to let their bratty kid play with a toy to keep him quiet - unfortunately the toy was A SET OF KEYS. *headdesk* And there were a couple other kids who wouldn't shut the hell up. Or, rather, whose parents wouldn't shut them the hell up. And I'm not talking about little babies where it can't be helped - I mean a kid who was old enough to burst out "I WANT MY TOY! WAAAHHHHHH" before thankfully being escorted out by the parent(s). And that's not to mention all the religious fanatics who tried to turn the funeral service into an altar call/revival. One guy got up there and basically said the same four sentences over and over again for about ten minutes. "I know Tim loved every single person in this room. I know Tim wants to see all of you again. Please, if any of you don't know Jesus Christ, please talk to someone here and accept him into your life." Okay, so it was the same THREE sentences over and over.
My god, it was a circus.
However, the graveside part of the service was like a complete 180 from that. Only a few people showed up, which would include everyone who was acting respectably and no one who wasn't. Evidently Tim was in the Army at some point, as there was an eight-man detail there. They gave him a 21-gun salute and did the whole folding the flag and giving it to the wife thing, which was very nice. First time I'd seen that in person, I was impressed.
Tandra and I have had some limited conversation about Drea. Mostly it consisted of me stressing Tandra out further by bitching about it all the time, but some progress was made. Tandra has in fact noticed the same things I have and these things do bother her. That was something I wasn't sure of before. Tandra's willing to give her a little more time and benefit of the doubt, so I'm willing to go along with that.
I don't know if Tandra said anything to Drea last night, but last night Drea slept in the basement for the first time in I don't know how long. Of course that might have had something to do with the comment I made when Drea came in the kitchen to get something to drink - "Hey, Drea, that's the first time I've seen you off the couch in three days!" Of course I pretended like I was just teasing, but I was completely serious, and completely truthful, and I think she knew it. Or maybe it had to do with the fact that Tandra cleaned the living room really well and it looks really nice and Drea just didn't feel at home or comfortable in such a clean, uncluttered space. *shrug*
So now today Tandra and I both have to work, and no one is available to watch the kids, so we're actually going to the extent of asking my parents to do it, rather than ask Drea to do it. See, if we ever ask Drea to watch our kids, then there's the obligation to say yes if she ever asks us to watch her kids, and Tandra and I want absolutely nothing to do with that. So we're pulling my parents out of retirement for the afternoon. Good times.
Life, the Universe, and Everything
Finally I actually have a couple specific ideas on where I want to go, and I have an idea for plans on how to get there. What I don't have is 100% confidence that it's what the other important people in my life want to do. I'm completely willing to be patient if that's what I need to do, but there's also the bit inside that says that if I've found some direction, I should pursue it and take my loved ones with me. That's kind of like kidnapping though. *headdesk again*